Use your own internal compass to guide you. Nothing external can possibly know the truth of your soul.
You see, we all have our own TRUTH filter. Some of us just dont know how to use it. Oftentimes we defer to the teacher or master. The one who we want to be like or emulate. The one who seems to have all the answers. The one who seems to have life all together.
But the truth is, you are not with them 24/7. And they are not with YOU. How could they possibly know what is best for you?
My WHOLE LIFE up until now had been a yielding to the “teacher,” the parent, the mentor, the boyfriend, the guru, the teaching itself.
I conformed to meet expectations and if someone said jump, I said how high. If I was enthusiastic and enamored by the teacher or teaching, I deferred to THEIR TRUTH. I was a truth spreader a truth titan.. but never of my own.
I wanted recognition. I wanted validation. I wanted someone else to do the work for me. I wanted a formula. I wanted a fix. I wanted love externally. I wanted to be the best. I wanted someone else, anyone else, to tell me who I was. I wanted love and to have love I learned I had to please. I had to wear a mask of their liking to have their approval and love. I was so fucking good at it.
I let others tell me who I SHOULD be. What I SHOULD do. I let society at large decide the trajectory of my life: go to school, get married, have kids, follow the program.
My spiritual journey was even more difficult. I thought others could tap in, hear, see, sense feel more than I could. Please oh please tell me who I am because I dont TRUST MYSELF… I CANT HEAR MY TRUTH. (How could I hear it. I had so many damn masks on)
So that’s what they did. They told me half truths. They got part of it right. They had a piece of the puzzle. They read a piece of me. But no one knew the WHOLE STORY. The whole PUZZLE like me. No one could know the completeness of me like me.
But how could I see me if I had layers and layers of teachers and teachings and others truths over me? Well thats where THE WORK come in. The deconditioning. The unlearning. The conscious UNCOUPLING of everything. I had to get RAW NAKED REAL AND VULNERABLE to begin to clothe myself in dignity and grace and the truth of who I am in the eyes of god.
I was looking for god in all the wrong places. Looking for someone else to see me to love me unconditionally. To tell me what only god could. And that god you ask?
WAS NOT in the catholic church I attended as a child WAS NOT in my teachers, mentors, gurus WAS NOT in the clique at school WAS NOT in my college degree WAS NOT in the mastermind WAS NOT in the business WAS NOT in anything external
Yes god was all those things. God was in all those things/people. But god was expressed through THEIR filter/THEIR human. But the ME I was searching for was not in a belonging or approval to anything/anyone else. The TRUTH of who I AM was not going to be reflected back to me or spoken to me UNTIL I looked inside and found it all within.
You see, all of those things were me, were god because we are all interconnected and ONE in the grand scheme of things, but until I knew my sovereignty, until I knew my piece of the puzzle I could not know the “other”.
When we look externally for ourselves before knowing oursleves we tend to become the other. We try to emulate them. We try to conform to what they see in us. The only person who knows us is god. And the wholeness of god is WITHIN US. That spark of light is inside your heart.
My journey was always one of seeking a higher power. Looking for that higher power to tell me who I AM. Looking for that belonging and unconditional love. When I looked for god outside of me I never found “him”. When i began to look for myself outside of myself i never found her.
But when i turned INWARD i found GOD and MYSELF. That turning in attuned me to my Truth. To my Self. To my Wholeness. To my Home.
In witnessing the power and light within I was able to recognize that spark in others. That NAMASTE.
We are all ONE, yes that is true, but we are all DIFFERENT. No one person is the same. No one person expresses that god source/that spark of light the same. And NO ONE ELSE can tell you who you are and what your truth is. NO ONE.
These teachings, these systems. They are not the end all be all. They are here to TURN YOU BACK INWARD.
When we begin to recognize oursleves in the teachings they are FOR THE MIND. And we are not our minds. We are so much more. The truth of our being is within our HEARTS and words cannot begin to describe the depths of our souls within, the depth of our connection and communion with the greater power/source/god.
These systems bring us into an alignment with our Truth with our Self. We release all the layers of conditioning and programming when we CHOOSE a higher expression of our blueprint.
And then guess what… we unbox oursleves from the blueprint itself. We become infinite. We become boundless. We become a divine expression of superabundance. We are limitless and we choose. We choose from our one point not our mind. From our epicenter. From our core.
And these systems help you turn inward to find that core. We traverse through the mazy pathways of our heart. The labyrinth constructed from the wounded parts of our mind and emotions. We meet the deepest parts of our heart and our truth when we make the journey back home to oursleves. Our light and gentle whisker within is what guides us. And if we falter or lose our focus, the signs and external nudges push us back inward and remind us of the truth.
Because the moment we COMMIT. The moment we DEVOTE ourselves to uncovering our truth is the moment the universe conspires to help you reach your goal.
If you keep asking for answers externally, the universe keeps bringing you gurus, teachers, systems, mentors etc to tell you “half truths.”If you ask for inner guidance then the only external things you attract are the Angels who keep directing you inward.
This has been my life lesson. This has been my saving grace. This has been my story.
I share this with you all because of our resonance. Because I want to be your angel who guides you back home to yourself. And I want to publicly thank my Angels who, whether they knew it or not, guided me BACK HOME TO MY HEART.
Thank you and I love you.